So, now
by Crimson Lipstick
Summary: You know you don’t need Liz anymore. And you know, getting involved in her life, will only bring down your own... Companion piece to So, yeah & So, anyway. R&R!


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A/N: I thought to explain the titles of the stories in this little 'series'. So, yeah was Lizzie's side of events, and in it, she explains her life and tries to make it seem that she has accepted, and how in a twisted way, she can't change. So, anyway is Gordo's angle, and he's basically showing how he's not obsessed with Lizzie; more of as if he were in denial, and you can see in the way, he quickly tries to move on to other topics. So, now, is the final installment and is Miranda's POV. Her story is probably the most realistic one, and shows the changes in their life, and how things are at present. Her view however, may be a little strong.

I hope that makes sense. It was a bit hard to phrase, so just let me know, if you don't understand. Anyway, again, huge thanks to everyone who reviewed and commented. I'm sorry I haven't been able to individually respond.

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So, now

By Crimson Lipstick

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It was never Liz. That was the first thing that properly registered in your mind. After all, even from the very first day you met in elementary school, you knew that. But now, that's all she goes by. And the most troubling thing is, it doesn't bother you much at all.

Gordo doesn't accept that you don't worry about Liz, but he does accept her name change, because that would just bring one step closer to being with Liz, and then you have to wonder just when did Gordo become so pathetic. But then you realize in a way, he has always been like that. You feel bad of course, for thinking that, but not as bad as you would have before. You don't know why, and if you did, you liked to pretend you don't.

He's changed. But if you didn't know Gordo, you wouldn't think that all. He's still kind of nerdy, in most of the honour classes, has that damn curly hair, and would probably marry his camera if the law allowed it, but, underneath all of that, he's different. He's just more… _distant_, and you feel there's stuff about him you don't know. Like he's keeping secrets from you, which you find annoying, because aren't you his oldest friend? (You have a feeling you already know the answer to that question). His girlfriend doesn't help things much. She clearly doesn't like you, and you can't honestly say you like her that much either. But strangely enough, he's secretive with her too.

So, now, you try and figure out what's going on with him. You honestly don't want to lose another friend. But at the same time, if you and Gordo didn't have history, you'd probably have ceased being friends a longtime ago. Anyway, every time you pry, both of you get into a fight, which is never properly apologized for, and fuck, it makes you really hate the changes that have occurred.

The main change of course was Liz. You don't like speaking about it. You don't see the point of dwelling on the past. All you want to say is that she was your best friend until she ditched you. Because, really, however selfish that may sound, that's what happened. Kind of like Kate Sanders. In fact, very much like Kate. It doesn't matter what 'stuff' Lizzie is into now; if Angel wasn't, she wouldn't be either.

Well, granted, some of the stuff Liz is into is kind of… rough, but at one stage you have to understand that she stopped worrying about you a long time ago, and then you should too, because if Liz wanted help, she would have gotten it by now.

So, now, you occupy yourself with other means. You busied yourself with your violin, and became involved with many clubs and plays, just to get your mind away from everything. It was only supposed to be temporary, but it's worked out to so much more than that. It's been three years, and now you hardly think about her. And when you do, it's never about the old Lizzie.

Sometimes you feel you are the only one, out of the old 'trio,' that fully realizes the changes that have overcome all of your lives. You also feel you are the only one who doesn't care, and is able to accept. And then you wish you could claim that you had horrible past, or miserable life, or some other shit, to justify your bitchiness and new attitude. But you can't. You have friends, you get good grades, you have lovable parents, a cute little sister and tomorrow you're going to ask your crush out. Your life is going pretty good at the moment.

You know you don't need Liz anymore. And you know, getting involved in her life, will only bring down your own. Remember, you were in seventh grade when it occurred. And you understand perfectly well; in fact so well it scares you, but you get it.

So, now, you just ignore her and don't speak to her.

Just because you know it's the only way you'll ever be able to move on. And just because you know, she probably isn't even worth it.

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End file.
